amazing calculations

by **Roma-_** Fri Oct 24, 2008 9:47 am

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart
man + smart woman = romance

Smart
man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb
man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb
man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart
boss + smart employee = profit

Smart
boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb
boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb
boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH

A man
will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman
will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman
worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man
never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A
successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can
spend.

A
successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS

To be
happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
little.

To be
happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at
all.

LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a
lot more willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A
woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man
marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

DISCUSSION T! ECHNIQUE

A
woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new
argument.

SEND
THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE SMART GUYS YOU KNOW CAN
HANDLE IT.